Coming in 2014…
Explicit adult series next year…fellatio…cunnilingus…Brazilian or not…wax verses shaving…erogenous zones. Why is sex dirty in America?
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Facing the final day of twenty-thirteen, I’m trying not to get sentimental about the past twelve months. I’ve done some really great things, made some solid decisions and optimized my goals. There are some not so good things, as well.
Using my head;
I begin this blog…no I haven’t been consistent with my postings. Time hasn’t been on my side and then the subject matter, trying to be creative, entertaining and interesting has been a challenge. I’ve written about my experiences and that has made the act of putting the thoughts into sentences a lot easier.
I remodeled my kitchen this past year. I’m pleased with my creative results. It wasn’t easy, living without a kitchen sink, a garbage disposal, a dishwasher, stovetop and an oven. A tiny dorm room refrigerator and a microwave made me create new ways of eating. Gallon jugs of water allowed me to enjoy my morning coffee…something no one would want to see…me without my morning cup of coffee. Then there’s the dust, the noise, the fuss, the strangers looming about. I don’t know who suffered more. Me or my two, very large, very protective, stuck in their way of a daily routine German Shepherds, who at times would look at me and clearly wonder…WHAT THE FUCK!!
So I compromised, with daily trips to doggie daycare, even when I had no appointments or tennis matches. My tennis suffered greatly. My league record was awful, embarrassing to a point that I knew when the new ratings were published that I’d get kicked back a level. But the tennis poopas held me in their favor, I loss an alphabet. If you know anything about tennis ratings you’ll know that wasn’t, too bad. Yes, “the odds were ever in my favor”! I did learn that focus is just as important as reading the other side of the net. Focus provides accuracy, something I lacked the entire spring league season.
So now that the house is back in order, I’ve got new toys in the kitchen and the Shepherds are back in their groove, I expect to kick some big ass in spring of twenty-fourteen.
I paid cash for all my holiday gifts and celebrations. No January blues for this gal. I didn’t over indulge in food or drink this year. Yay! I’ll be able to zip my skinny girl jeans next month.
I made some new friends (females) during the year…seems like they’ll be long lasting. We’ve got several things in common and that always helps.
Not using my head, reacting with my heart;
Lordy, somebody shoot me now! I’m still taking calls from my police detective former serious relationship boyfriend. If you’ve followed my blog you’ll recall the heart breaking story. Why I continue to pick up the phone…no solid reasoning…I’m boarder line, teetering on the edge telling myself, NO, I’m not (purposefully) stringing him along to tug at his heart…at the right moment pulling the cord at just the moment to break it…not admitting that, but clearly I’m doing something. I’ve convinced myself I’ll jump off this fence when I’m 100% about what it is I’m doing…til then I continue to answer. I have promised to visit…It’s my normal flight south during the unbearable cold season here. Only this time I’m taking my four legged, fur covered BFFs…no over night stays…no unexpected overnight company.
There’s the gawd awful email I sent. I told a former beau/friend that I’d rarely had an orgasm while with him. I thought he was a cheap ass SOB who wasn’t’ that great in bed. It was a douzzy of a letter, fueled by anger. Enough! I was over his warped thinking that I was a last minute phone call when he was bored or was feeling horny…wanting a good lay. I gave this guy hellova blow jobs…some of my best work. He didn’t appreciate the “friends with benefit” relationship. He’d call to say he wanted to come by…go out for a casual meal & drink, not really a date. If I was available with nothing planned, I’d meet him at a restaurant; always paid for my drink and meals…I never called him or expected him to pay. We were friends after dating a few years ago, for a short period, nothing serious. The last time he called, he rudely didn’t show up nor did he have the graciousness to call. I had a drink and then order a salad at the bar…left when I finished. I gave it great thought and even waited a full 24 hours before I hit “send”. Had I been thinking with my head, sans emotion, I would have called him and left a voice mail.
What the future holds;
I resolve not to make resolutions for twenty-fourteen. Nothing promised, nothing to regret.
Happy New Year y’all!
Tis the season to be jolly…
If we’re honest with ourselves, which we rarely are, we’d see that between the middle, or in this case the last week in November, and the very first day of the new year, we openly…freely…over extend ourselves. We eat, drink and commit a lot of merriment. There are office parties, friends having parties, we throw a party. All to eat…most importantly drink to excess…most of us anyway. There are a lot of morning afters, for one reason or the other. The walk of shame is common during these celebrated weeks. I’ve found that going out to an office party can lead to big trouble with a capitol “F”. Getting carried away with the evening’s festivities, there’s always someone there who’ll strike the libido and there’s no stopping the libido when there’s a free flowing of alcohol.
Two things to make the evening a fun night and a better morning;
I pack a pair of jeans, a shirt, a pair of flats, make-up remover, a tooth brush and I eat something before I head out, nothing too, heavy but nutritious.
I stay away from the obnoxious drinkers, as the evening progresses they’ll become the touchy feely ones and the word no, stop, please don’t, will en sense them to create a scene. This isn’t limited to gender specific. Women can be just as obnoxious as men, probably more so. It may be wise to make sure the hot guy in the corner is not only wearing a wedding band, but is in fact a hot guy in the corner because he did come alone. But be on the look out for the girl whose had her eye on him since last year’s holiday gala…she’s dressed for him tonight, she’s poked and prodded all year to find out his favorite color, what scents he prone to and the ones he’s not. She’s gonna be super pissed if you show up and the hot guy in the corner has the hott’s for you. Can you say; CAT FIGHT!!!!! This can also apply to guys…change the gender and you’ve got a parking lot brawl. And guys I have to say; it’s sooooo sexy when y’all get to tussling and knocking heads like wild mountain rams. It’s so civilized; you remove your jackets and watches and go for it.
Yes. Tis the season to be jolly!
If you must make out in the ladies room…please check your hair and makeup for it’s proper form…mascara-raccoon eyes and puffy bed hair is a dead give away that you’ve just given it away in the potty. Guys, please check your face for lipstick! Ladies tend to wear a heavier than usual smear to combat the loss of color while snacking and drinking. Nothing says; I just got a piece of pune-tang in the potty, like you wear the latest lip co lour. And ladies, unless you plan to share…do it in the ladies room, men don’t understand that you’re only in there to give it up to the guy that’s banging you back up against the bathroom stall’s door. There may…just maybe be a line forming on the other side while you’re moaning and groaning. This is a sure fired combination, moaning, groaning, rhythmic pounding and alcohol for a man’s penis to come to life…guys have a difficult enough time taking a leak when their cock is hard as a rock…relief becomes the priority and the word no is mute to the cock’s ears. Yes, I said cock’s ears…the little head is in full control at this space in time and the big head that houses the ears is not with us…it’s there, you can see the ears and the head, but they are not in control.
In case anyone’s interested, my favorite place is a parking lot! The colder the better! I never said I wasn’t freaky. If you thought that…that’s your fault. A dark spot between two cars…a quickie of some sort…depends on my mood, actually. There are times…plenty of times that I get off on giving and after all it is the holidays…a festive holiday party…fellatio is often my gift of choice. Yoga allows me to stoop…bend to the perfect position for optimum rhythm and deep thrusting. And make sure there are no camera’s in eye shot.
Panty hose are a big no, no. Too restrictive, cumbersome for removal and putting back on…there are other remedies if you must wear hose. Ladies, just so you’ll know, there ain’t nothing sexy about panty hose…I believe some prude invented them to keep her locked down and hard to reach. A man can’t cop a feel with those damn things guarding your vajay-jay…Tis the season…Enjoy one and all!
Please enjoy responsibiltly